1. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Stopwatch!
Stopwatch who?
Stopwatch you’re doing and open this door!
2. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Theodore!
Theodore who? Theodore wasn’t open so I knocked!
3. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Water.
Water who?
Water you doing? Open the door!
4. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Adore.
Adore who?
Adore is between us. Open up!
5. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
King Tut.
King Tut who?
King Tut-key fried chicken!
6. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in it’s cold out here.
7. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Interrupting cow!
Interrupt-
Moo!!
8. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie way you can let me in now.
9. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Venice.
Venice who?
Venice this door gonna open?
10. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Weevil.
Weevil who?
Weevil rock you.
11. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Euripides.
Euripides who?
Euripides jeans, you pay for them!
12. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Yacht.
Yacht who?
Yacht to know me by now!
13. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
I did up.
I did up who?
Ha ha you did a poo!
14. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Theodore.
Theodore who?
Theodore wasn’t open so I knocked!
15. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Police.
Police who?
Police hurry up, it’s cold out here!
16. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Cargo.
Cargo who?
No, car go “beep beep”!
17. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Heidi.
Heidi who?
Heidi ‘cided to come over to play!
18. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Omar.
Omar who?
Omar goodness, wrong door!
19. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to let me in?
20. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Panther.
Panther who?
Panther no panth, I’m going thwimming!
21. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Goliath.
Goliath who?
Goliath down, thou looketh tired!
22. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
23. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Aida.
Aida who?
Aida sandwich for lunch today!
24. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Howl.
Howl who?
Howl you know it’s really me unless you open the door?
25. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Icing.
Icing who?
Icing so loud, the neighbors can hear!
26. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
A little girl.
A little girl who?
A little girl who can’t reach the doorbell!
27. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the trunk, you pack the suitcase.
28. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Dozen.
Dozen who?
Dozen anyone want to let me in?
29. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Al!
Al who?
Al give you a kiss if you open this door!
30. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Keith.
Keith who?
Keith me, my thweet preenth!
31. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Ya.
Ya who?
I’m excited to see you too!
32. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Wurlitzer.
Wurlitzer who?
Wurlitzer one for the money, two for the show…
33. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Claire.
Claire who?
Claire the way; I’m coming in!
34. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Interrupting pirate.
Interrupt… ARRRRRRRRR!
35. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Aardvark.
Aardvark who?
Aardvark a hundred miles for one of your smiles!
36. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Wanda.
Wanda who?
Wanda hang out with me right now?
37. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Carmen.
Carmen who?
Carmen let me in already!
38. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Sherlock.
Sherlock who?
Sherlock your door shut tight.
39. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Mike Snifferpippets.
Mike Snifferpippets who?
Oh come on, how many Mike Snifferpippets do you know? Now let me in, it’s cold out here!
40. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the suitcase, you load up the car!
41. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Wooden shoe.
Wooden shoe who?
Wooden shoe like to hear another joke?
42. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?
Eww, no thanks. I don’t want to smell your poo!
43. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Thor.
Thor who?
Thor knuckleth from knocking!
44. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes a nice place you got here.
45. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Philip.
Philip who?
Philip my cup, I’m thirsty!
46. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Cereal.
Cereal who?
Cereal pleasure to meet you!
47. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Doris.
Doris who?
Doris locked. Open up!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
I don’t know.
To get to the idiot’s house.
48. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Police.
Police who?
Police stop telling these awful knock knock jokes!
49. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Anee.
Anee who?
Anee one you like!
50. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Oswald.
Oswald who?
Oswald my bubble gum!
51. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Ken.
Ken who?
Ken you let me in?
52. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Will.
Will who?
Will you just open the door already?
53. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Canoe.
Canoe who?
Canoe help me with my homework?
54. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dozen.
Dozen who?
Dozen anybody want to let me in?
55. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Needle.
Needle who?
Needle little money for the movies.
56. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Avenue.
Avenue who?
Avenue knocked on this door before?
57. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin the neighborhood and thought I’d come over.
58. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Isabelle.
Isabelle who?
Isabelle working, or should I keep knocking?
59. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up and let me in!
60. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Adolph.
Adolph who?
Adolph ball hit me in the mouth that why I talk this way!
61. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
H.
H who?
Bless you!
62. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you! Hand over your cash!
63. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Control Freak.
Con—
Okay, now you say, “Control Freak who?”
64. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Cash.
Cash who?
I didn’t realize you were some kind of nut!
65. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish you a Merry Christmas!
66. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Aww, don’t cry – it’s just a joke.
67. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben knocking for 20 minutes!
68. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Abbie.
Abbie who?
Abbie birthday!
69. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
A herd.
A herd who?
A herd you were home, so I came over!
70. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Noah.
Noah who?
Noah good place we can get something to eat?
71. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin the piggy bank again.
72. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dwayne.
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub, it’s overflowing!
73. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Butch, Jimmy and Joe.
Butch, Jimmy and Joe who?
Butch your arms around me, Jimmy a little kiss and never let me Joe.
74. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use. I forgot my name again!
75. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
No, to whom.
76. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Moustache.
Moustache who?
Moustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later!
77. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie body going to open the door already?
78. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You’re welcome!
79. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Roach.
Roach who?
Roach you a letter, did you get it?
80. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Al.
Al who?
Al give you a kiss if you open the door!
81. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Witches.
Witches who?
Witches the way home?
82. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Amos.
Amos who?
A mosquito bit me!
83. Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Owls say.
Owls say who?
Yep!
84. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Says!
Says who?
Says me, that’s who?
85. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Ima.
Ima who?
Ima psychiatrist. I’m here ’cause you won’t open up!
86. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Amos.
Amos who?
Amosquito just bit me!
87. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Mary Lee.
Mary Lee who?
Mary Lee down the stream.
88. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Botany.
Botany who?
Botany good locks lately?
89. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Acid!
Acid who?
Acid down and be quiet!
90. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Ice cream!
Ice cream who?
Ice cream if you don’t let me in!
91. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Cousin!
Cousin who?
Cousin stead of opening the door, you’re making me stand here!
92. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Noah.
Noah who?
Noah way to open the door?
93. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Sadie!
Sadie who?
Sadie air is hot out here!
94. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Hatch.
Hatch who?
Bless you and please cover your mouth next time.
95. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry, it’s just a joke.
96. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Mikey!
Mikey who?
Mikey doesn’t fit in the keyhole!
97. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Thermos.
Thermos who?
Thermos be a better knock-knock joke than this.
98. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Candice.
Candice who?
Candice door open, please?
99. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Island!
Island who?
Island here and you won’t open up!
100. Knock, Knock!
Who’s there?
Hawaii.
Hawaii who?
I’m fine. Hawaii you?
Comments